WHY YOU SHOULD GO ON A DATE WITH YOUR S.O. + 5 FUN DATE IDEAS
Happy Friday guys! Today, I wanna talk about a fun topic: Dates. Or more specifically, going on dates with your significant other.
I feel like too many of us see dates as something we do until we meet someone we wanna be with, and then... Crickets. But why, though? I personally don't get it. I feel like going on a date is not something we should give up on just because we are in steady relationships. As a matter of fact, Sasha and I try to go on a date once a week. And by date, I don't actually mean dinner and a movie.
Actually, I've never even been on a date that was dinner and a movie.... Wait, does that mean I've never been on a real date? Huh, maybe! But you know what? I wouldn't change that for the world. Because to me, watching a movie isn't really a date. Before you throw imaginary rocks at me, let me explain.
To me, a date is an activity you do that allows you to get to know the other person better. While a movie might be fun to watch, it doesn't really allow you to talk to the person you're on a date with. I mean, yes, you can talk about the movie after... But you could do that just as well about a movie you've each seen on your own. So I'm not saying you shouldn't see movies with your significant other, I'm just saying it shouldn't count as your weekly date.
And yes, you've read that right. Weekly date. I was having this conversation with a married woman recently and I was really surprised by her reaction. She basically told me "I know everything about my husband, I don't need to learn more about him every week". Which really got me thinking, because I personally highly disagree with that statement. To me, actually, this is how people get divorced. They feel like they know everything about the other person and stop taking interest. And once you stop taking interest in your significant other is usually when things go downhill.
And if you think your husband (or wife) hasn't changed in the past 6 months, or even the past 6 weeks, you're wrong. People change, constantly. We see new movies, read new books, meet new people, see new things, wear new clothes, go to new places, eat new food... All of that has an impact on the way we see life, and, dare I say, on who we are as people.
So I feel like it's important to keep getting to know each other no matter what. It's also proven that we, as humans, connect more deeply with people we can interact with on a deeper level. Confess things, talk about our dreams and fears... You guys get it. And I'm not saying that if you go on a date a week, you'll completely change your relationship... Actually, wait. That's exactly what I'm saying.
I can obviously only speak for myself here, which I will do with this little story: You guys know I work from home. When Sasha gets back from work, I'm usually sitting at my computer, wearing leggings and a ratty sweater. My hair is probably up in a messy bun and I'm wearing no makeup. To sum it up, it's not cute. I know he loves me anyway, but that's besides the point. Because when we go on a date, I'll stop working an hour early, have a glass of wine, dress nicely, put some makeup on... And probably even brush my hair, if I'm feeling fancy AF.
Then we go out, have some fun, talk to each other, laugh... It's the best. And when we come back home, well... I'll let you fill in the blanks, wink wink.
And I'm not saying we don't have sex (just keeping it real), or talk or laugh with each other on any other day. In fact, I think it's important to make a point of doing these things with your life partner as often as possible, and to try new things. Because that's what keeps a relationship fresh.
But the main difference between a "regular" night and a date night is one simple thing. The effort that goes into it. When you think about it, effort is what makes us feel appreciated and loved in any relationship. No wonder it's the thought that counts is such a popular saying. Just think about this: Is it really the flowers that you love, or the fact that your boyfriend even got them for you? To me, it's definitely the latter.
I also love going on a special outing, but what makes me really love it is the fact that my man wanted to spend some time with me, and organized something that he knew would make me happy. It doesn't have to be complicated or expensive, by the way. Not AT ALL (see below for fun date ideas).
To me, the whole point of going a date with your significant other is to spend some fun time with each other. Time that doesn't revolve around the house or the kids or work. Just the two of you, what you love at the moment and making time to be friends on top of lovers. I know it's SO annoying when people say sh*t like I married my best friend, but in a way, it's friendship that holds a relationship together in the long run.
Looks will fade, the novelty factor will fade even quicker. But building a solid friendship is what matters in the long run, because it's all that remains when your husband is too old to get it up and your tits are in your shoes, ha!
But in the meantime, building that friendship doesn't have to be boring. Personally, when I go on dates with Sasha, I like to go out of my way to look sexy. This is just a personal preference, and everyone is different. I just feel like I never get the chance to dress for him when we go to family events, or work-related stuff. On the daily, I dress for myself first, (obviously) which means I sometimes wear things he doesn't understand.
But on date nights, I like my man to know that I made an effort specifically for him. This red dress is a great example of that. I'd never wear it for brunch with girlfriends or to a family function. On date nights though, it's a huge success. If I'm being really honest, I love when I wear something and Sasha tells me "Please tell me you wouldn't wear this if I'm not around" with a face that looks like the heart-eyed emoji. I linked a few similar options below, because this one is two years old, from Zara.
Ok, so now that we've stablished that it's super important to keep the flame burning and go on weekly dates... What the hell can you do that't not the same boring old thing every week, right? Turns out, LOTS of things. As I said, I don't like considering dinner and a movie as the only option. To me, it's not even an option for a date, honestly. That's completely personal preference, of course, but I also like to switch things up. I feel like doing the same thing or going to the same place every week can easily become like a chore. Here's how I like to get down for date night (or day):
5 FUN DATE IDEAS
TRY A NEW RESTAURANT: Ok, so dinner dates are super classic, I know. But I guess it makes sense, because eating out is one of the only situations in which you'll be sitting across from each other and talk for a few hours. Food is also amazing, if we're being honest, and well, you have to eat anyways. When we go on a dinner date, I like to try a place we've never tried before. That way, it also feels like a fun, novel experience.
DISCOVER A NEW NEIGHBORHOOD: This might be a little easier if you live in a big city, granted. But one thing we love doing for date night is just driving to anew neighborhood, park the car somewhere and walk on a busy street. It can be really fun to discover places not too far from where you live. For example, we're in Marina Del Rey, but some of my favourite neighbourhood discoveries have been in Venice, Culver City and Santa Monica. I also love subscribing to some local events newsletters, so I get anything that's happening near me in my inbox, like street festival and pop-up markets.
GO TO A THEME-PARK: This is by far one of my favourite at the moment, since Sasha took me to Universal Studios. I used to think theme parks were for kids, but that's so wrong! Sometimes it's great to behave like a kid and do something that's not so serious. I actually love seeing my man in a silly, fun light, and I feel like a theme park is the perfect place for that. Some bigger parks can be quite expensive (Universal is 99$ a day for California resident), but smaller parks and fairs are super fun too! Also, it's scientifically proven that experiencing adrenaline rushes with someone makes that relationship stronger... So go hop on that scary ride and have fun!
GO CAMPING FOR A NIGHT: Three years ago, I would have laughed at this and said never while rolling my eyes. But after being brought camping in the desert a few times, I actually see the appeal. And trust me, if I can do it, anyone can do it. I'm not a natural-born camper, and I need to shower every day, otherwise I'm an uncomfortable, raging bitch. BUT, camping for one night can be super fun if you put your mind to it. I also think it's fun to experience something with your S.O. that's so different from every day life.
More than one night is a little much for me, but I have to admit I'm a fan of a little road trip, setting up camp and making it as cozy as possible, barbecuing dinner, and snuggling next to the fire... Before making it back into an LED candle-lit tent with a good bottle of champagne. Not to be all sappy and sh*t, but every time we go camping, it makes me love my man a little more, because he's so strong and good at everything. I feel truly protected with him, even in the middle of nowhere with coyotes and snakes.
COOK A MEAL TOGETHER: So as I said, date night doesn't have to be expensive... Or even out of the house! One thing I love doing at home is cooking a meal together. It can be something that takes longer than usual and is a little fancy. Like something you normally wouldn't cook on a weeknight. I like putting on some Frank Sinatra, opening a nice bottle and just having fun. Bonus points if you just wear lingerie under your apron and can't keep your hands off of each other the whole time!
These are just 5 ideas, but there's obviously so much you can do! Another fave of mine is wine tasting, which I talked about in my post about experience gifts. I also feel like going dancing is always fun... And don't knock double-dates either, they can be super fun once in a while. I personally never get enough of watching my man interact in a group and I always think he's so funny and smart.
What do you guys think about weekly dates? Is that something you would do? I definitely hope I convinced you, haha! And I would also LOVE to hear your stories on the best dates you've had with your S.O. You can leave me a comment below, or come chat on Instagram!
Love, Jenny xx